Questrants

There’s a new trend in restaurant concepts gaining popularity across all nine continents, a concept industry insiders have dubbed, Questrants.

These establishments offer unique dining experiences by forcing customers to “quest” for their meal, adding thrills, chills and sometimes death to an array of culinary delights.

Here are some of the most popular:

cockpitYour meal begins in the tape-covered seat of a vintage de Havilland float plane piloted by a drunken ex-Navy Seal who talks to the craft like one would an ex-lover.

It’s your job to keep him awake long enough to land safely at a hidden outpost along the slopes of Crocodile Mountain, where you’ll be able to re-supply and place your order from a menu of Nepalese favourites and American classics (think burgers and dogs).

Back onboard you’ll find yourself alone, as your pilot will have disappeared into a nearby village where his tribal mistress resides. Take the controls and dogfight your way through a barrage of enemy aircraft until ejecting over the Kai Hyung Plains where your food will be waiting, hot and ready, on a table made of bones.

amazone
Natural beauty gives way to hidden dangers as you dine in one of the most unforgiving climates on Earth.

The danger is real but the food is exceptional–try the Bog Hen sous vide in the natural humidity of the jungle, or a risotto cooked in the microbial-rich waters of the Amazon river.

While nine out of nine diners would recommend the food from head chef, Mana of the Watu people, eight out nine customers go home with an infection, diarrhoea or a venomous creature burrowed into their skin.

cypherOne lucky member of each dining party is selected upon arrival and tasked with rescuing remaining members from armed terrorists.

The bulk of your party will be blindfold and treated as hostages inside a 10×10 concrete room at an undisclosed location. They’ll be lightly tortured and served an array of food utilizing the latest in molecular gastronomy: “Piss” that’s actually a fresh squeezed yuzu lemonade with coconut “piss foam”, “Mouldy Bread” made from an artisanal blue cheese and real San Francisco sour dough, and “Dog Meat”, a Wagyu rib eye topped with a red wine reduction to simulate the loose blood one would find on rare mutt steak common to conflict zones.

Meanwhile, the hero of your party will be provided a mission dossier, forged documents and a box of condoms to aid them in rescuing the hostages. Each stage of the mission will include an amuse-bouche, as well as an attractive companion who may or may not be working for the enemy.

The final course will be served on the observation deck of the Burj Khalifa tower so long as everyone survives the final showdown.

knives

An area of Manitoba’s densest boreal forest is stocked with farm-raised game among rare wild mushrooms and an variety of woodland berries.

Check in with your hostess (reserve early to avoid long queues that often stretch into wolf territory) who will fill you in on what’s available that day and allow you to select knife or gun. The dress code? Nudity! You will be stripped down to nothing and sent into the wild to hunt, kill and skin your meal.

Bring the carcass to one of their world class chefs who will prepare it grilled, baked, or deep fried and fashion a new coat or cap out of the pelt as you wait.

foodriverSelections of fresh seafood and tasty sides are carefully loaded into the rucksacks of your servers: Armed aqua raiders who set out downriver atop modified Sea Doos.

Upon entry, each patron is assigned a Thai long-tail boat, a selection of spears, a suicide pill, and a hand drawn glossary describing each raider and the different foods each has in their possession. Overtake your selected raider using cunning and skill, collect your bounty and enjoy your meal on the muddy banks.

 

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