The man at the store said your outfit could transition seamlessly from office casual to night heat chic but when you look in the mirror after work, you decide you’d better change into something more appropriate for a night out at BAM! Bar. While changing out of your overalls and into a sexy snakeskin skin, you realize you forgot about your Advent calendar! Mid-nude you bite open the December 11 window to reveal today’s treat:
The blood of an Englishman! And fresh too. You sort of wish that you got to keep the boy so you could take him to the bar but he says he still has nine more pints to give before the 11th turns to the 12th.
Only 14 days left you can’t remember if it’s worth it to keep the tinsel until next year or just throw it out and get more. I mean, it’s pretty cheap. But ever since you moved that huge mirror that you swore was humming out of the closet, there’s plenty more room for storage.
GLENN W. MACAULAY 