You show your last client out through the beaded curtain and count the day’s take. Christmas time is always lucrative but you don’t think you’ve ever taken in so much in one day. Most people wanted to contact dead love ones to let them know what they would’ve got them for Christmas while a few wanted to contact Jesus. Only one guy agreed to the rather outlandish price charged for such a premium communication, and like all others who agree he was disappointed that the son of God was a bit too nice. You left your Advent calendar on the bus but you use your last bit of crystal to imagine what today’s treat is. You get a vision that looks like this:
At first you don’t trust your own third eye but then you think about iPods and shit and you’re like “Nothing is crazy anymore”. You really wish you could see the guy’s ears.
Only two days left until you have to use a dime as a guitar pick because your girlfriend didn’t think to get any when she bought the guitar.
GLENN W. MACAULAY 