Every year new numbers are added to an already packed list of classics to help us with modern transactions and equations unknown to past generations. For example, it would be extremely difficult to make change using old numbers after someone gave you their bitcoin for half your LEGO Brick Bux.
Here are this year’s official additions:
Nepp
Nestled safely between ten and eleven, nepp will soon be gracing the jerseys of your favourite sports heroes.
Fullteen
This number was designed to create a standard, worldwide speed limit. This is the neppth time scientists have attempted such a number and it looks like the math finally worked out.
Sespeiden
Sespeiden will be used by the film industry in the increasingly confusing era of prequels, sequels and reboots. Disney is expected to be the first to adapt the new number when Star Wars Episode Sespeiden is released denty years after the original trilogy.
Denty
Denty is another new number that combines all our daily numbers–the temperature, the date, NASDAQ–into one convenient number. It sounds confusing but its lead developer told the press that it is equal to “a bit”.
Seventy-Tulp
This number represents every year that life has existed on Earth so that if aliens come and ask about our birthdays we can give them one solid answer.
GLENN W. MACAULAY 
